40/40 Vision

Last month I turned 40 and had this idea to list 40 of the lessons that think I will carry with me to the next phase of life. The list below is my attempt to capture some of these thoughts. 1. I have learnt that when people ask you how you are they would rather you tell them about your headache than your heartache. 2. I have learnt that sticks and stones may break my bones however words will definitely break my soul. 3. I have learnt that God is not manipulated by tears and prayer. 4. I have learnt that you need to be more deliberate when going down than when going up. 5. I have learnt that sometimes it helps to think ‘get thee behind me satan’ when someone says something that will potentially harm my spirit. 6. I have learnt that telling people about your issues with God is no different from telling people about your issues with your spouse/partner…think carefully before you open your mouth. 7. I have learnt that God does not have to make sense, in fact if He always made sense then He would not be God. 8. I have learnt that sometimes I don’t make sense, even to myself. 9. I have learnt that I don’t always have to explain myself. 10. I have learnt that I do not have to apologise for being me. 11. I have learnt that I would rather be alive and miserable than dead and dead. 12. I have learnt that loving is a decision. 13. I have learnt that it is ok to say no and not give an excuse. 14. I have learnt that it is ok to not be ok. 15. I have learnt that perfection is overrated. 16. I have learnt that asking for help is more of a sign of strength than not asking for help. 17. I have learnt that loneliness can be just as devastating as heartbreak. 18. I have learnt that God does give you more than you can handle, it’s called stretch targets (how else would you grow). 19. I have learnt that doing the right thing does not shield you from pain. 20. I have learnt that people will resent you for having the guts to say or do that which they can’t. 21. I have learnt that people are not always interested in your side of the story, instead they just want to confirm their interpretation of the story. 22. I have learnt that it is not always about me, in fact in most cases it really has nothing whatsoever to do with me, I just happen to be there. 23. I have learnt that the voices in my head do not always have my best interest at heart. 24. I have learnt that life and fat happens to most of us. 25. I have learnt that sometimes feeling sad actually feels good because it feels familiar. 26. I have learnt that nothing can’t be learnt given enough time, no matter what your age is. 27. I have learnt that grey hair is great as it means you actually have hair. 28. I have learnt that having someone you can cry with is just as precious as having someone to sometimes laugh with. 29. I have learnt that people who actually see beyond your mask are scary and somewhat annoying. 30. I have learnt that life is a series of push or pull events, sometimes you’re fleeing away from something and sometimes you’re running towards something. 31. I have learnt that aging only sets in when you stop dancing and wrinkles become obvious only when you stop laughing. 32. I have learnt that it takes less effort to think that to not think. 33. I have learnt that joy may come in the morning but the night can be too damn long. 34. I have learnt that at times all that people care about is that they appear to be care. 35. I have learnt that people don’t think about you as much as you think they do. 36. I have learnt that at times those who hate you the most are the ones who secretly wish you liked them more. 37. I have learnt that claiming to work well under pressure is an admission of procrastination or poor planning. 38. I have learnt that a smile will hide much more than a frown can. 39. I have learnt that God is not really responsible for many of the things attributed to Him. 40. I have learnt that worrying may not help the situation much but it sure does make one feel busy. 41. I have learnt that as always I don’t really know when to stop